A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything

I neglected you!

Fri, 17 Jul 2009 16:14:35 +0100

I am so sorry darling blog! I’ve neglected you!

Alas I’ve turned another year older since my last post and did very well for presents thank you very much. Whilst I’ve been majorly productive today at work and have managed to get a fair amount done, I still feel like I could have done more.

I’m in one of those moods today where I feel fairly cheerful but easily bored and want to do something majorly exciting.

I guess going on holiday is a massively exciting prospect. I can’t wait to go and lie in the sun, do some snorkeling and enjoy driving around the little island.

I miss the sun, the food, the people and the general good feeling that Malta gives me.

Roll on September 25th

Blah!

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 12:02:24 +0100

I hate feeling like a big fat muppet and today I definitely feel like that. Pretty emotional and not liking it one bit. Times like this I wish I could escape and just tell the world to go away. I need a field to chill in away from everyone. Oh to be care free

Blogalog

Wed, 10 Jun 2009 16:27:52 +0100

I’m just posting quickly to say I have another blog running specifically to document my eye laser treatment journey. Find it at

www.meeyes.tumblr.com

A lot of people have already done this little activity and now I...

Mon, 25 May 2009 21:43:00 +0100

A lot of people have already done this little activity and now I am too:

Join in!

1 - Go to Wikipedia. Hit “random”
or click en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to Quotations Page and select "random quotations"
or click www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four or five words of the very last quote on the page is the title of your first album.

3 - Go to Flickr and click on “explore the last seven days”
or click www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4 - Use Photoshop or similar to put it all together.

5 - Post it with this text in the "caption" or "comment" and TAG the friends you want to join in.

Flat as a pancake

Thu, 21 May 2009 10:42:23 +0100

Today’s not started well. I should have driven to work feeling on top of the world because tomorrow is my last day and I should eb in the zone.

Instead I set off and automatically notice something is wrong with my car. I park up at the station after 3 minutes of “flapping” noises coming from my car and check it over. The rear right tyre is as flat as a pancake and then it occurs to me I’ve been driving on the rims. :S

Looking at the tyre I notice a huge screw sticking out and so now I am torn between trying to change the tyre or running to get the train.

I get the train…

So tonight when I get back to the station I have the task of getting my spare on before the weekend as I’ll have to purchase another for my journey to Halifax.

I’ve been feeling a little off kilter all week and can only think my hormones are all crazy. Silly things have been bugging me and it’s winding me up to think that I am even remotely bothered by all this.

Perhaps tonight I need to sleep early in preparation for a monumental day.

(via icanread) This is the best feeling

Wed, 20 May 2009 17:08:30 +0100

(via icanread)

This is the best feeling

Time flies...

Wed, 20 May 2009 11:52:59 +0100

So it’s been a crazy old time since I last blogged. I’ve had such a lot going on in my little world that it’s been hard to know what day it is.

This is however my final week at TradeDoubler and it’s Mittwoch (as Sam likes to say :)) which means that after today, I’ll only have 2 full days left at the company.

It’s been a really crazy year and 9 months. Such a lot has happened in that time. I’ve had over 4 managers through redundancy, personal reasons, and now I too am leaving the fold. I’ve seen good friends go and have lost my Dad through a heart attack.

To leave has not been an easy decision to make, in fact it’s been bloody hard because deep down this is really all I know. First job from Uni and I’ve made some great life friends and gathered some great life experiences. I’ve grown as a person and have learnt where my bounderies lie and mellowed out as a whole.

I’ve seriously learnt such a lot from the people around me and the awesome friends I’ve made. I’m truly going to miss my team and the great atmosphere that the office has.

There will be parts I won’t miss but I’d rather not dwell on them because right now I feel contented and happy about leaving and embarking upon the adventure that lies before me.

As a whole this is a big step for me. I’m leaving behind my family and work colleagues, London and everything that is familiar to me. But to be honest I don’t feel scared or worried. For the first time in my life I’ve never felt surer that this is something I need to do and knowing I have Sam next to me te whole way, reassures me all the more.

So it’s with a heavy heart I say goodbye to the Agency team at TD and hello to a new life with my boyfriend and the people of Leeds.

I’m exicted!

Firstly photo credit to www.pcpowerplay.com.au Secondly we just...

Wed, 22 Apr 2009 15:51:59 +0100

Firstly photo credit to www.pcpowerplay.com.au

Secondly we just had dinner at a lovely little restaurant which is built into the side of St James’ park. The roof is covered in grass to make it a little less obvious in the age old park.

The food itself is pretty ok but not outstanding and pretty expensive for what you get.

The main attraction of us going there though was the fact that the big man himself Bill Gates was there dining with his family. When we weren’t discussing Apple products as loudly as possible and calling each others iPhones, we were trying to get photos.

What children we are :)

Ok so...

Tue, 21 Apr 2009 13:58:56 +0100

Today is a bad day. Why it’s a bad day I don’t know but all I know is that I’m not “feeling” today. I think I’m being a bit unreasonable in my expectations of how things should be going, (the problem is that I have decided how the day should be and now because it’s not following that pattern I’m stressing about it)

My main issue is where I’ve been told to attend a meeting and I am far from appropriately dressed. As a result I am in a big fat mood. I hate having PMT and I hate feeling like everything is wrong with my day because of one little mishap.

Time to beat myself into some kind of mindset…one that doesn’t involve whinging…

Leaving on a jet plane, don't know when I'll be back again...

Mon, 20 Apr 2009 22:43:36 +0100

Ok so the title is a bit far from the truth but I am indeed leaving. I am quiting the big smoke that is London, moving away from Kent and all that I have ever known and instead swapping it for the north. Am I scared? Not really. I don’t feel like I have anything to be worried about. I’m moving in with my lovely boyfriend and his mental cat, taking Aggy McBun with me and starting my new life, richer in money and in love.

Today has been a bit of an enlightening day as a whole as it’s been a bit of an eye opener. My team got told in our meeting that I am leaving and I also told one of our major clients that I’d be going onto a new job. The look on their faces and their genuine disappointment at my leaving was actually surprising. I had no idea that I’d be missed as much as they’re saying they will.

Dharmesh was singing “I can’t live if living is without you” today and Franky is proposing he has a cardboard cut out in my place to make sure he doesn’t miss me too much.

Gemma was upset that our team elevensies would be no more (“Who’s going to make the cake!”) and on returning from my meeting Mona and Franky stated it had been too quiet without me.

Even people who I’d not spoken to or spent time with in a while were asking to go for lunch and catch up.

I guess though it made me appreciate how much of an impact I had made and I’m glad I’m going out on a high. Nothing could be better than that. :)

So I took the plunge went for the job interview in Leeds and...

Tue, 07 Apr 2009 23:08:05 +0100

So I took the plunge went for the job interview in Leeds and only went and got the blooming job didn’t I?!?

Really really chuffed about this and it’s a positive move for my career and life in general. So who will I be moving in with? Well if you hadn’t guessed from the picture, it’ll be my lovely boyfriend Sam :)

Very exciting times all round and today wasn’t easy telling Mona. I am really going to miss my little Mona P. Still I have a really lovely big bunch of flowers to deliver to her just before I leave.

G20

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 16:55:00 +0100

So I pretty much live in Victoria as this is where I spend most of my time working. Because we’re so close to Westminster we’re on high alert for the protesters who are protesting against everything and anything. The twats.

All I’ve heard so far this morning is a shit load of police cars whizzing past but no actual fights. The television isn’t doing much to make me feel worried about these protests either. I’ve been to scarier pop concerts.

Ok so I am in a whingey mood today, work is crap, my boyfriend is in Leeds, I have too much work to do and I am so hormonal, I make the incredible Hulk look like a pussycat.

I’m quite aware I’m whinging and whining but to be honest nothing is really helping right now except the sunshine and CHOCOLATE! Ah chocolate, the greatest recipe known to man. I could marry a kitkat right now…

Blah blah blah

Tue, 31 Mar 2009 21:40:31 +0100

Yep you’ve guessed it today has been another one of those days. Really not enjoying work at the minute and everything seems to be a struggle.

It’s at time like these you’re really glad to have someone fighting your corner and that’s why I am thankful I work with Mona. I can always rely on her to provide me with some back up if I feel against the wall and she’s really great at boosting me and keeping me believing I am doing a good job.

Unfortunately it’s not always possible to get relationships like this elsewhere and whether it be at home, work or socially, sometimes, it’s those relationships you feel you get the most out of. You don’t ask for the support but they give it to you anyway, and it’s at times like that, that I feel incredibly lucky.

The economy

Tue, 31 Mar 2009 00:10:28 +0100

So I know this has been done to death and I think it’s fair to say that every person in the world is now aware we’re in an economic recession.
What I do want to add however is that because of some stupid actions by a few stupid people, more people are now suffering than need be. This recession has been caused by us. All of us, because a recession is not some mythical creature that like a plague causes people to lose their jobs. Instead it’s the result of people panicking in reaction to Northern Rock and the fact that America couldn’t sort out their mortgage lending. IF we’d all kept our heads and continued to behave as we had done for the last 10 years, we’d now not be facing financial uncertainty and our children’s futures would be set. Instead, we’re now all struggling to manage to live and even those of us with jobs are finding the situation incredibly stressful.

I’m lucky I have a job but it doesn’t mean that my life is a breeze. Instead a huge amount of pressure and stress is placed on me to get the tasks of 3 people done in one day, instead of just my own.

This in turn means that I have to consider my future at the company I work for and whether or not I can stand to stay there. Whilst I really enjoy my job the majority of the time, it’s the company politics involved that cause me the most grief. It seems as with most companies, it’s not about working to the best method to ensure we all work well and together, it’s more about trying to prove a point and brown nose as many people as possible.

I absolutely can’t stand this and because I don’t agree with this behaviour I find myself not getting the recognition or promotion I deserve. This is not because I don’t work well and not because I don’t deserve it, but more because I don’t agree with compromising my integrity and morals to get to where I want to be. If I have worked hard, then I feel I should be promoted.

Now I’m coming to terms with the fact that I probably not going to get this and so I have no option but to look elsewhere. This saddens me because ultimately I’m good at my job and without my knowledge and help across the product, they’ll find it hard to operate without me. Again this is not me being arrogant but I am the only person support this function across the UK.

Time to formulate a plan me thinks…

The Egyptians

Mon, 23 Mar 2009 21:33:06 +0000

I’m watching a program on Cleopatra and lord knows why but I could watch facial reconstructions and skeletal analysis as well as excavations all day.

I love HISTORY…

Jed I Knight

Mon, 23 Mar 2009 21:30:00 +0000

Jed I Knight:

Because Daddy is obviously a star wars fan and Mummy obviously feels she had to give in.

Today I dug up the grass in front of my Dad’s grave....

Sun, 22 Mar 2009 22:22:03 +0000

Today I dug up the grass in front of my Dad’s grave. Sounds morbid but we wanted to make the most of the space he has there. So we’ve got some nice Tulips that are red and white like the maltese cross and some nice heather to line it all. Then to finish it off we’re going to line the edges with some border and put some creamy white stones on the grave to prevent the cats digging there.

I think he’d be impressed at how nice it looks and I’m really chuffed myself. I think it does him proud and although today was mother’s day, I found myself really missing him. We sat through a church service and they’d chosen all the songs that Dad would sing really loudly. The whole way through I could hear him singing along. I think I’m finally getting the point, where although I still mourn my Dad, I really appreciate the time I got to spend with him and all the memories I have of him. I’m not sure whether this is because I am a lot more contented with my life and how much of a difference Sam has made to all this but either way right now I can’t help but be a little bit happy.

I hope I continue to feel this glad. On the down side today I found out my insurance has gone up by £10 a month…the scoundrels.

Postsecret

Thu, 12 Mar 2009 20:11:53 +0000

On a recent trip to Huddersfield with Sam we stopped in the art section of Waterstones. Sam managed to get a book at a 100% mark down (thats another story) but he also showed me a book called PostSecret which I had to buy.

The theory behind this book was to get people to write a secret anonymously on a post card and then for them to send it to the author. Whilst some are a bit tongue in cheek, some are utterly shocking and others upsetting.

It made me think about all the secrets I had and why we feel the shame to have to keep these as secrets. For many people, what seems like a large secret may to others be next to nothing and blown out of proportion all because of the shame they feel.

I found it surprising how willing people are to share a secret anonymously with someone they don’t even know. Perhaps it therapeutic. There’s one secret that I harbour and its not something I’ve done but it’s something that would devastate someone I know because it was ultimately their fault.

It also got me thinking about the secrets my Dad had before he died. There were two we know he kept and for one he promised the person who told him that he’d never disclose what they had told him. He never did.

It makes me proud to think that my Dad was that honourable but then again was this secret a burden that my Dad could have shared?

Sometimes it might just be better to be honest and if you can’t be honest with those you love, perhaps putting it on a postcard to a complete stranger will do the trick.

A note

Wed, 04 Mar 2009 21:20:20 +0000

I was going to write some self-obsessed pondering but I can’t be arsed to bore you today

LISTS

Mon, 02 Mar 2009 22:03:50 +0000

So I am desperate to move up to the North so I can find a new job and move closer to my boyfriend. Some people may think this is a crazy idea especially in the current economic climate but things are so unbelievably difficult at work right now that I feel that if I don’t move near the one person who makes me happy, then I may never feel like I belong anywhere. Not only that but being away from Sam makes me feel sick, physically. I can’t explain how wonderful I feel when I am with him. So in order to get the ball rolling and so I am fully prepared, I have lists of things to do. These include:

-getting a refund on my train ticket for 2 days

-clearing out my clothes and taking stuff to the charity shop that I no longer wear

-putting all my CDs on my itunes and then selling the CDs on Ebay

-getting my shit together in general.

I love organising myself. So satisfying!